The Yearbook Office
Writings on staying alive

Here's to giving up. To packing it in. To throwing in the towel. Here's to quitting. Here's to walking away. Here's to saying "enough" and letting that be the answer.

Here's to recognizing when things are not working, and no longer trying to force something that is never going to happen. To accepting that there are always more factors than hard work and grit.

Here's to valuing the time you put in, even if it did not lead to success, because it was probably never going to lead to success. Because "success" is such a bullshit yardstick to measure anything by. Fuck success. Anything worth having should be attainable.

Here's not to complacency, but recognizing that you gave your best and maybe it was not enough, but you gave your best. To accepting that there was nothing more you could do. To trying not to feel guilty about that. You always feel guilty because you believe there was something more you could do, but that is no way to live.

Here's to stopping to take the time to seriously think about why you want the things you want, and if you actually want them or if you just think you do. Here's to figuring out what you actually want and being okay if it looks nothing like what you thought you wanted. Here's to having no fucking clue what it is you want, and realizing that constantly moving is not helping matters any. How does anyone know what they want? Fuck if I know.

Here's to stopping, just stopping for a second, to look at a map, or ask for directions, or rethink your direction after driving lost on a dark road for way too long.

And here's to recognizing that maybe you did get lost along the way, but it was okay because you liked where you were going. And maybe that was fine for a while, until it was no longer fine and you never accepted your feelings, instead pushing them down in favor of continuing on this new road you paved for yourself.

Here's to doing less.

Here's to realizing that it is okay to be still. That there is nothing wrong if you never accomplish anything. Most people never accomplish anything and are perfectly fine with it. They lead happy lives, happier than yours anyway. You can just stop and everything will be fine.

Just stop.

No one is expecting you to do anything, I mean unless they are, but this is not about that. Things will keep happening. And you probably will be happier. That seems likely.

Here's to self-care, sure. But let us not dwell on that too much, we have it easy enough as it is.

Here's to celebrating the work that was done instead of constantly worrying about what is to come. I am really bad at that and I would like to get better, if only because thinking the things you spend your life working on lose value ten minutes after they are released is also no way to live.

Here's to letting go of things that only make it harder on yourself, as if that is something possible for one to do.

And here's to finishing, since that is always the most important part of anything. Sure, you are not finishing where you wanted to, but then an ending is an ending.

So here's to giving up.